I don’t know what to think anymore
My mind has come unhinged.
Everything is so confusing right now
My heart is burned. Crispy and singed.
I’m crumbling into pieces of dust
Don’t even recognize this face.
You’ve tainted everything about me
Memories glued tightly in place.
Somehow I kept you for this long
Yet you were never even mine.
Just a plaything to be toyed with
Like a fish hooked on your line.
Incapable of loving anything selflessly
Seeking pleasure in obsessions.
I tried to help, tried to heal you
You’re one of life’s cruelest lessons.
Might as well be a stupid kid’s yo-yo
Spinning up and down, up and down.
Broken promises paved by selfish greed
Pushing me under, watching me drown.
Life solely revolves around your desires
Anything to feed your ego’s high.
Selling out everybody along the way
Charming us with sugar-coated lies.
Drugs, alcohol, gambling, exercise, and pills
Sex, shopping, fighting, and vaping.
No limits to the madness, anything is game
It should all be yours for the taking.
How much longer like this can you go
Because, baby, I’m all tapped out
There’s not a flicker of fight left within
My faith replaced with doubt.
Tantrum all you want, screaming and accusing
I took the blame far too long for you.
The anger fueling these obsessions won’t subside
I’m left damaged, abandoned, without a clue.
Your self-destruction is killing me
Bruised and defeated, I lay here weeping
How can someone be this way
Oblivious of their unresolved wounds seeping?