Keeping Communication Lines Open With Tiffin Talk

 

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photo courtesy of pixabay.com

 

When it comes to raising children, there is one thing that parents find themselves struggling with most throughout the years. In part because children are constantly developing and changing as they go through the different phases of growing up, but also because parents have a hard time understanding and relating to their children at each level along the way. I’m talking about communication, people.

Throughout the first year of life, parents dedicate a lot of time and energy to encouraging their babies to be vocal. We covet their first incoherent sounds as if the angelic sounding babbles and coos are the Holy Grail of speech- in all of its splendor and glory. Diligently, we strive to turn them into coherent speech, coaxing our little ones to repeat after us as we recite silly little nursery rhymes in a higher octave than usual. When they do, we rejoice and celebrate their accomplishments, in the same manner, we would if they had just won the Nobel Peace Prize or a Golden Globe award.

Then parents spend the next 17 years shushing them, ignoring them, or punishing them for speaking too loudly, out of turn, or with carelessness. We show irritation when their stories go on and on and on without a concrete point. We get annoyed by the endless questions to which we have no good answers. Life becomes chaotic and we no longer take the time to give their voices our full attention. It is a complete contradiction to that first year of life when we hung on every sound our child made with excitement and anticipation.

By the time they head off to school, parents have sent so many mixed signals regarding communication, despite the reassurances that they can tell us anything, at any time, children begin to censor themselves. The lines of communication between parent and child begin to breakdown. Besides… why would kids want to talk to their parents about stuff now that they have friends/classmates who genuinely want to listen to all they have to say?

We can ask them about their day, what they learned, who they played with, and what special activities they participated in until we’re blue in the face, but they have no desire to sit down and spill the beans like they did when they were 3 and never stopped talking. Instead, we get the “Fine.”, “Okay.”, “I don’t know.”, “Why do you want to know?”, and shoulder shrugging grunts in response before they saunter to their rooms to turn on their various techy devices and ask for a snack. It’s easier to pull their teeth out then it is to get them to open up and talk freely about anything that isn’t of special interest to them.

 

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photo courtesy of pixabay.com

 

Enter Tiffin Talk.

This simple, easy to use, and age-appropriate program gets kids talking to us again. And not about this Youtube video or that new video game or whatever other technology-induced madness they’re wrapped up in these days- which we’re sick of hearing about and part of the reason they believe we lost interest in what they have to say. Tiffin Talk gets our kids to talk about THEM – their personal thoughts and beliefs about various topics which divulge who they are as an individual and their place in this world while they revel in some one on one time with their parents. From this program, both parent and child will be able to better understand one another and relate to each other’s experiences, bringing everyone closer together while re-opening the withering lines of communication.

Sounds impossible, I know. But it works. I tried it with my own brood of hoodlums and was greatly surprised when it was successful in doing just what it says it will do. (post to come soon highlighting our personal experience using Tiffin Talk.)

So what and how does this program work exactly, you ask? It is simply a boxed set of what looks like your average, everyday Thank You cards that are divided into themes and separated by the number of weeks you’ve used the program. For example, our first month of cards were all about “Memories” and they were split into week 1, week 2, week 3, etc, and each week had cards labeled for Monday-Friday, giving you the weekend off.

 

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a sample of what the Tiffin Talk program boxes and question cards look like

 

There are specific sets for every school-age group from kindergarten-high school so the questions are well-suited for each developmental stage. The older the child, the deeper the topics delve and more thought-provoking the questions are, challenging your child to use their brain without them realizing it. Just one card a day with one big question or a few smaller ones to answer that engages kids in a way our typical parental-need-to-know based questions do not- easy peasy. The best part is, no one will balk over sacrificing the five minutes it takes up. In fact, it may lead y’all to continue talking for even longer because your child WANTS to… and it’s not about the mindless technology hoopla that is pointless to us all!

Either way, those 5 minutes will be more productive and valuably spent by ‘turning the tech off and turning the talk on,’ than any other 5-minute window in which you have your child’s full attention. Guaranteed.

So, as a parent, if you really want to preserve the lines of communication with your child before it’s too late, Tiffin Talk is the way to go. Or the way to begin. Whichever doesn’t matter. The fact is, this is the most ingenious program for parent-child relationships that I have ever stumbled upon. The only one to make me eat my skepticism and want to tell the world about how awesomely wonderful it truly is. What are you waiting for now? Go over to their site now and see it for yourself! Tiffin Talk really does gets kids to turn the tech off and the talk on- with purpose and meaning!

 

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photo courtesy of pixabay.com

 

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My Daughter, You’re Now A Young Lady

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My daughter, you have grown right into a most beautiful young lady. Full of sparkling energy and the air of someone wiser than her years, you are, also, loaded with just a pinch too much sass. I envy you for that, actually. Even with my years, I still have a shadow of shy reservation following me, snubbing out my own twinkle, more often than not. It’s a wonderful combination that will do great things for you, if you continue to use those almighty powerful brains of yours. If you do, you’ll have a competitive edge in the game of life.

I can only hope that I will be able to fill my duties painstakingly, build you up to be the best You that you can ever be. I can see that shadow of mine trying to creep in, trying to dim your sparkle, when, instead, you could be shining under the spotlight. It is my resolve to give you the necessary tools you will need to shine bright without hesitation, learning how to hold back that shadow trying to creep in and  Your bucket of self-worth will be overflowing by the time I send you off to face the world alone. Every passing day it seems, that you go on and prove to me again and again, just how close that bucket is to being full already. For that, you should be ever so proud and feel pleased with yourself. So many girls in your generation will never know how much they are truly worth from the inside out. Those girls lack a mama who will enlighten them, teaching them to believe in the 6 B’s: Books Before Boys and Brains Before Beauty.

There’s a delicate softness inside of you, my dear child. Just underneath the superficial layer of ostentatious dramatics you wear with conviction, there’s an open-minded, warm-hearted, tenderness that draws people to you, like a magnet. Especially, those who need extra emotional TLC. This gift will take years for you to come to terms with and accept. It may feel like a curse right now while you are still so young and inexperienced, because your maturity and wisdom are rapidly developing, more than I’m ever ready for. The scope of your sophistication doesn’t reach beyond what is contained to your own childhood, unable to fully comprehend the needs of those that flock around you. One day, I do promise, your ability to nurture those in need, will eventually open your world up bigger than you’ve ever dreamt it could, before. I’ve never known a girl who loves to love just as much as I do. Once you cultivate and refine your sensitivity for the needs of others, your love will become explosive and limitless.

That softer side of you also hides a fierce, but, vehemently unseasoned protector of all those in her flock and family without hesitation or questioning. You’ll stand up for anyone under attack, ready to defend the goodness in everyone until your last breath, yet, you won’t hesitate to call someone out for a wrongdoing of their own. There’s something about you when you’re upset over a grave injustice which stirs up just enough crazy with your passion, that makes you a bit intimidating. It takes less than 3 seconds to send you into a tizzy that can cause hairs on my head to bypass gray and skip straight to 90 year old woman white. Yet, you will be the first one to befriend the enemy, calling a truce, making peace, and offering a helping hand so they don’t feel threatened by life any longer. Hugs flow aplenty when you’re around! Even your teacher says there’s never been such an overabundance of hugs from just one student in her First Grade classroom, before she had you for a student this year. When you cry, it comes straight from the depths of your heart, your sobs shaking the very foundation upon which our house lies. That nurturing nature you’re developing, is ready to lift up everyone who’s fallen down and hug away the pain, regardless of what happened to land them there. Many adults will never have that in them, yet you do so young still. That’s something that should make you feel spectacularly special, my love. Just like I do about you.

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Your childhood is over the halfway point now and it’s going to begin winding down now as you begin to inch closer towards your teenage years. In fact, I can already see the beginning signs of your coming maturation taking affect. It is increasingly important for you, now more than ever, to pay close attention to all the knowledge that I’m trying to teach you about the ways of this world. These lessons are irreplaceable and priceless in building up your confidence and self-esteem until they’re overflowing from your bucket, and they will be invaluable tools in coping with and solving the problems of the real world. For someone of your age, your intelligence level continually astonishes me and worries me about keeping your head on straight further on down the road. When your iron will is challenged, the facetiousness of your forthcoming argument keeps me on my toes, otherwise you’d be dancing across me wearing those two-inch heels and glamour girl makeup I specifically forbid from ending up on your body before you’re old enough to vote. These next few years are a time to take in everything I have to give you, so you’re fully prepared to take on the world one small baby step towards leaving the nest at a time.

My beautiful, beautiful girl. This mom cannot believe that you are that same newborn who was so content laying back and taking it all in. Where you once were happy with just being near your family, now you’re only content when the show revolves around you. It is my wish for you to stay this true to yourself throughout the rest of your life. Take all that I am giving you and follow your heart, the rest of life will fall into place on its own. Just don’t ever stop sharing your love, don’t close your heart or your mind, and don’t doubt these words I write to you. With all that you are, you can fight any good fight that comes your way, and rise above. Love yourself before you let others in to steal your heart away, or you’ll find yourself lost and empty feeling, looking for that love everywhere but within your own self. I know if you take heed, life will be a wondrous adventure for you and you’ll find the strength to make your dreams a reality.

The day you were born, changed my life forever. You, my sweet Baby Bean, brought a light into my world that altered my vision and dreams forever. You have given me a gift just by being here, being my daughter, and I’m so grateful and appreciative to have been chosen to receive that gift that is you. Know that I will always be here, your lighthouse in the harbor, guiding your way with the love for you that flows unconditionally, and once you ship off, setting sail for the freedom of your own course in life, you will always be able to turn home again, finding your way safely back to my open arms. I love you, my baby girl. My young lady. Be who you are meant to be- always more, but nothing less. At least, always remember the sing-song words you so often torture your brother’s with:

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